Be true to who you are…..

And the family name you bear……


Saturday, January 30, 2010

Have you ever wondered....

Why the Lord moves the way he does? I know, who am I to question? Right? But sometimes I am just amazed.

I thought last year I had a pretty rough year. My son wrecked his dirt bike, leaving me and my "precious time" at the mercy of doctors, surgeons, physical therapists etc.. By any standards the fact that my son walks and talks is nothing more than God's ultimate show of love for me. But was I thankful? Yes, with lip service..but in my heart I had a pity party. Add to that my aging grandparents who are really my parents, an alcoholic mother, pay cuts, ........ and whine, whine, whine.... yes, this year I was singing the blues.

Until one day, a small comment appeared on my blog. From that comment began a friendship and for me a life changing , attitude adjusting experience that I will never forget.

I want you to meet my friend, Cindy.

The Lord took one of Cindy's boys to heaven, last January.

John, was 14.....

Which of your children just popped into your head? Did you jump up and run to hug them? Yeah, me too. See this entire year I've been hugging and hanging on to my children more. I've been praying and thanking God at the end of each day that I was given that day. And my thankfulness, because of Cindy's story, has been more than lip service.

If ever there was clay being used by the Potter, it would be dear Cindy. I have read her broken posts and seen God's mercy and grace shine through her in a way I cannot explain. The path He chose for her causes me to cringe but She walks it daily...... and her light shines around to those of us who hide and hope that we will never be called to serve in such a way.

Her story is painful but every day she gets up and carries on....I often wonder if I could do the same. I'm pretty certain I could not.

Cindy, graciously, has given me a lemonade award for my blog. She was to give it to blogs that have an attitude of gratitude. Those who take the lemons in life and turn them into lemonade.
I was touched. But she is the ultimate "lemonade maker". I in turn was to give it to ten other blogs....I only follow nine and four of them are hers. Instead I will give it back to her, and encourage you to check out her blogs... I have posted one link and from there you can enter all the others. I promise it will be time well spent. I promise you will be blessed.

www.ctipsanhints.blogspot.com


Thank you Cindy.



Wednesday, January 27, 2010

2009



If you can see this I finally learned how to post a video!!

Fifteen Minutes

Do you remember the old saying..........I can't either.....
It goes something along the lines of everyone having their 15 minutes of fame? Well, it's been a busy year of fame for my guys.

It started with Shane working on a DIY house in Montana..
"The Ultimate Sportsman's Retreat" built by the owners of the DIY network. I had a hard time picturing the owners as ultimate sportsman. But I guess if it is your show you can call it what ever you want. This show was somewhat of a challenge for me, Shane would come home every night and ask me how it felt to be sleeping with a movie star.....it was all I could do to not take a pin and deflate his head.

For weeks and weeks he was filmed while he kicked cabinets, cut his finger, and got shocked rewiring a sparky's mistake. Yes, it was all there. Oh! and a lot of non mistakes too. Sorry, baby.

We don't have T.V. so I was unable to see it when it first aired but the DVD's were loaned to us last week. Honey, you look awful sexy on the big screen.....


Then it was the boy's turn. Now here! We have the Ultimate Sportsman! They were asked to take Jarrod Scott from "Jarrod Scott Outdoors" along on their trap lines for a local view of trapping. They were so cute! Ahh, they cringe when I use that word.

A trapper wouldn't be a trapper without a trappers hat so I had bought them each one for Christmas. I had to chuckle a little as they stood there in front of the camera with those big old hats and coveralls. Rednecks ~R~ US. Then there is the issue of them being so shy, being on a camera was very painful for them. I couldn't tell at times if they were excited or sick about it.

My favorite part of the whole show, however, is when they catch the biggest coon they have ever caught.... and suddenly the world stops. There is no longer a guy behind a camera, no longer hundreds of people who are going to be watching.....just the moment and Cody and David want to share it with their dad.

Cody begins stuttering... he has had a speech problem from birth, (in fact, there was a time I was told that he would be so profoundly retarded that I should consider an abortion ~but that is another post).

Thousands of dollars and just as many hours of speech therapy can be completely overrode in one split second of excitement, and there was more than a split second here... "Dad, daddy, dad?!" Cody takes a breath "Do you see the size of this coon, dad, daddy,daddy?" Now of course, Shane has not forgotten that the camera is still rolling so he quietly says "Yes, son, he's huge." But that is not good enough, Cody and David want him up there. They want Shane to stand beside them and LOOK at the coon and share their moment.

It touches my heart because there are many teens who wouldn't be caught dead with their parents. And here, the first person my sons think of is their dad. The Lord has blessed us with wonderful relationships with our children. I am ever so grateful. Oh, our family has it's moments, moments of disagreements and tiffs. We'd be a mighty boring lot if we all thought the same. But the friendship, the underlying support that permeates my family leaves me in awe of the Lord's goodness toward me.

In fact there isn't fifteen minutes of it I'd trade for anything in the world.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Wrapping them in love...

Let me share a story...

Maybe it was ten years ago.... My grandfather took my boys down to his basement and asked them if there was anything in the pile of odds and ends that they might want. The pile of odds and ends was the last effects of my great-grandmother's belongings. There wasn't much to interest a little boy but Andrew, about age three found a lap blanket and claimed it at his own. For years and years he hauled that thing everywhere.

Fast forward about seven years later and there is now standing before me a young lad of about ten asking me to repair the tattered blanket, or maybe tattered rag would be a better word. Only the front held together, the back was completely shredded and the batting gone.

"Son, you are too old for blankets." I said, appealing to his manly side in hopes of talking him out of it. I tried to explain that the front part would soon wear out and all our efforts would be in vain... But it was to no avail.
So, I told Andrew that he must do all the work by himself. I hand him the scissors and instruct him to cut all the tattered backing off and if he got it done we'd put it back together.....

In my mind the blanket was just not worth saving. I did not want to mess with it. In the process of using my big heavy scissors, Andy cut a few holes in the front side of the quilt as well... I honestly thought he would just give up and I'd be off the hook. But he didn't. Soon a beaming little boy brought me the front half of his blanket, a little worse for wear because of the snipped holes. I told him that I was busy and would not be able to get to it for a while... I put it in my closet and he ran off to play.

A while indeed...

Fast forward again to Christmas time this year. Shane has taken me shopping at a few shops looking for a music stand for Grace to place her harp music on. I didn't find the music stand but a few other trinkets and as I am checking out the clerk asks if I would like to purchase an "earth bag" you know, the cloth bags that replace plastic. She goes on to explain they were 99 cents and every time you brought it back in 2010 for shopping, you would get 10% off your total purchase. There is a sucker born every minute.

I didn't even look at the bag until I was in the truck on my way home. On the side of the bag was printed...You have the right to ditch the kids, and shop until you're sane again..... I was appalled. In my smug, snobish, attitude I quote "a child left to himself, bringeth his mother to shame.." I decided the next time I made it to town I would return the bag and tell them what I thought of their little snappy comment... until then I chucked it in my closet, and guess where it landed?

Yep, right on top of Andy's unfinished quilt. I tried to shut the closet door but there it sat. I tried to whine that I had just been too busy... But it rang hollow. Sure I'm busy, and much of my busy-ness is centered around them. But to not have time to finish a tiny lap quilt? Especially when it was so important to him? My mind raced as I thought of the wonderful old woman who not only stitched this quilt the first time but raised eleven children with more grace and patience than I will ever posses. I was without excuse. On this blog are hundreds of words, on the web thousands of sites, on my shelf many books... truth be told I have plenty of time for what I want to do.... truth be told I had ditched my son.



I was no longer the smug woman looking down her nose at others but looking down my nose at a pile of rags that seemed to ask "If I am not worth it, is he?" Needless to say the quilt is now finished. Years of waiting were finalized as soon as I got the tears out of my eyes.

It was a hard haul. lots and lots of time repairing and restitching. Lots of time for self reflection. True self reflection is often painful for me. I, however, need my vision renewed at times and I am grateful when those opportunities come. I offered the blanket to Andrew with an apology for taking so long. He snatched it out of my hand, thanking me all the while. And he never even used the word "finally."


He came to me a short time later, however, asking why the snip marks were all repaired in black? I smile, and reply " I hope they don't bother you son, but your momma needs to be able to see them okay?" "Sure mom!" and off he ran. I have given myself a visual reminder. And in my closet will forever hang one nasty little lying bag that will never earn me a discount at the store because it is worth far more right where it is at.

Carpet!

The boys are in.....






And this room is ready for it's next hundred years.

Whew! Glad to be done.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

A dangerous place indeed....

"It has come to the time where the most dangerous place to be in America is not the inner city, where gangs threaten innocent lives, or in angry prisons, where only the fit survive, but in the womb of a mother who is being told that if she doesn't really want the baby, an abortion is the solution."
~Chuck Swindoll

Monday, January 18, 2010

Ahhh.......

It's 6:10 p.m. and there are still traces of light in the night sky... my chickens laid three eggs today. Gentle reminders that the days are growing longer. Slowly, ever so slowly but longer none the less. It is freeing in a way, even though there are many days of winter left ~Spring is fluttering in our hearts and we wait expectantly.

Such is the walk of a Christian also. Yes? So many more days, many will be disappointing, some like tonight will be lighter but each one draws us closer to the final one where we can live forever in the eternal Sonshine....that thought too is freeing.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Cindy's tips and hints....

My girlfriend, Cindy, is giving away the cutest bag on her blog to celebrate her 5th birthday blogging... check her out at:

http://www.ctipsanhints.blogspot.com/

Thursday, January 7, 2010

22 below

Well, my little "weather for you" icon is a liar!!! it says-15 but it is actually -22. I'm cold, I'm cold and did I mention I am cold? I opened my door this morning and the catch froze in... took me five minutes just to be able to get my door to latch shut again.
The boys are bundled with thick scarves just to stop the frigid air from hurting their lungs while they do chores.
Thankfully we do not have any babies due until Monday...maybe it will break by then. Usually it lasts about two weeks but it has been so cold in December I am praying we are on the tail end instead of the beginning. Please explain global warming to me again........... just one more time????

Well, now that I have that off my chest I feel much better.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Snow!

Well, it finally warmed up enough to snow and snow and snow and snow!
Now, I have to give the credit for these pictures to Shane,
I'm too much of a whanny when it comes to snow and cold.
Run to the barn check the babies and
back to the house is about all I can do.

My poor picnic table.....dreaming of warmer days....











My trap line is around here somewhere!